These days everybody is talking about Sahayak System and by every body I mean media channels,newspapers or even social media can’t stop buzzing about colonial practice of army officers using jawans as their batman or buddies. Even the channels like NDTV and Aaj tak or newspapers like Times of India look fascinated about this piece of news and generously provide prime time slots to such news about Sahayak in Army. What more the e portal giants like The Quint or Hindustantime.com look smitten by this topic which is none of their business. For them, it is just a piece of news which is attracting public attention and increasing viewership. Except it,they have nothing to do with ‘exploitation of men’ sentiments else they would have also talked about exploitation of clerks by IAS officers, constables by IPS officers, peons by judges or other subordinates in various branch of government services. because it’s everywhere and menial jobs are not done by Sahayaks (as they claim) only but it is the virtue of power and situation that is the part of social set up of India only and happens everywhere.
Now as an army wife when you deal with such derogatory pieces of news on a social platform then you should know why you are targeted first. There are many reasons that exist like
-We are a very mysterious organisation which is still not known to Civilians. The essence can only be felt if you are a part of this magnificent organisation and lifestyle.
-Social networking turds know that Army people will never come forward to give their side of story. So they can freely write whatever they feel like. Why do you think we are called for floods and droughts as they know we would do our jobs even after the stone pelting.
-Media personnels know that this is the only organisation in India where no higher official will take an action against them to spread rumours or degrade our morales. We are too proud too do that.
And there are various other reason like these. So next time you see a reporting that says shits about the organisation,officer or wives just smile. You, at the end of the day helping them earning their bread. Just avoid commenting and sharing that piece of news because that is what they want, Involving more of our people and using them as their viewers by the same news which is against them. Nobody else bothers much corruption,college unions,employment etcetera catches common people attention more.
Now coming to the relationship of Army wives and Barman. You should know that why do we discuss it so often because we care! And it’s a healthy practice to discuss about our age old system and what should be changed and what should be kept suiting the present world but….only inside the organisation!
We as an organisation are extremely motivated,trained,aware and proud.
If anybody would bother about our jawans and bring a change that would any day would be the army officers and us not people outside who are struggling to earn their breads keeping aside the morales as bad as attacking an entire organisation who serves nation. It’s just not the soldiers but also the generals who win the war. Our roles are defined and we all do our jobs. No Tom,Dick or Harry can keep attacking our women or men.
So anyway, What we do is our business and none else but as an aware and caring Army wives (especially the young ones) should keep few things in mind.
-Any subordinate of your husband is your husband’s subordinate not yours.
-You are never entitled nor have any authority to tighten anybody even if he is really bad. Talk about it with your husband and it’s the officer’s responsibility to counsel helps and support.
-Even if the work is not getting done matching your perfection levels,accept it gratefully and manage rest on your own. Nobody is getting paid by you,they are there to help you and so be thankful to whatever.
-Yes,as messy as it sound you must dress properly when chaps are around your house and you. Afterall it’s respect from them which we should seek nothing else.
– When it comes to kids be a little conscious. At the end of day he is your kid and reflects your grooming. You should teach your kid to respect bhaiya.
-Don’t be a bossy and rude officer wife before the men rather a generous and graceful one who respect them back equally. Army wives relationship with Sahayaks is a two way road. Give and take!
If you treat batman right then they will also treat you right. All your buddy want is a little respect and protect their dignity. We respect each other and it’s just few cases here and there (Tej Bahadur Video who’s been a habitual offender) among lakhs of us that create a bad name and give opportunity to outsiders.
As an army officer’s wife your job is to make the buddy feel to be part of the house and establish a bond based on mutual trust and respect. They also know everything. Try being generous and see how you are not a part of their langar talks. Army is a small world after all and I repeat again don’t share,comment,discuss or even like any negative news on Army. Remember there are IAS officer and IPS officers who have household support and peons but it never makes a news but Indian army care about its jawans and being a part of a progressive organisation we should constantly improve ourselves.
We serve our nation and army wives are support that helps our men to fight everything including our own.
This post is just written in lights of frequent posts in media that make headlines for all the wrong reasons be it a martyr daughter making comments or bad supply of food or about buddy system . Whether it should persist or not is not our authority to decide but we can surely improve our behaviour towards people around us and try not give heed to negative news in media just not to break the morales of our organisation and support our troops as much as we can. If we don’t support our own organisation and people ourselves we can never expect outsiders to do that.
“And if you are reading it then I assume that you are an Indian Army lover or an Army wife so you should know that my fiction ‘Soldier’s girl’ is releasing in April 2017 which is a love story of a normal corporate girl who falls in love with a para commando only to lead the life an army girlfriend. Though it’s chick lit and fun to read but talks about Indian army life and epitomises army wife just to let this world know that there is a reason behind a term like ‘Army Wife’.”
Here are few links which might be useful to you