Dear Ekta Kapoor
I hope you and your family are safe during the testing times and staying together during the lockdown. Families staying together is bliss though, because we, hardly get to live together. I belong to the creed of Army wives who are mostly left behind while husbands serve the nation at faraway lands. But sometimes we do get lucky and get a peace tenure when the fauji father and the fauji husband gets to stay with us. Not that he is much at home but I still feel happy in whatever little ways he shares my responsibilities which were always meant to be shared together as a couple. But what truly fills my heart is when my children get to play with him and sometimes even get to show him the hobbies they are indulged in or the laurels they have earned in their school. Please never for a second, think that a soldier is not a responsible family man, in fact, the level of commitment and devotion found in his heart for his family is unmatchable, trust me emotions are only meant to be felt not expressed. It is just that he is duty-bound and he has taken an oath on his uniform which he earned through blood sweat and toil to think of his nation first that he is not able to give us time. For us, as his family members, we honour his commitment to his nation. We take immense pride in his job more than our collective existence and priorities because we believe our soldier is doing noblest of all the jobs. How many people hold the courage to spill blood for the safety, security, and most importantly sovereignty of their nation? Only Faujis!
When the whole nation is living behind closed doors, thousands of other faujis still leave for their duties undaunted, face death threats, risk their lives and throw challenges to the enemy of our nations despite the pandemic. While they try to take all the precautions Corona Virus is least of their worries If I talk about just this last month five of faujis made supreme sacrifice at Handwara, their families still mourn their deaths. One of the officer Colonel D Roberta sacrificed his life in north Sikkim avalanche and Ah, let’s not forget the recent India- China Standoff at Laddakh where thousands of our men are deployed and trust me it is tough for their families because they know all it takes is one bullet to start a war.
Now tell me do you think their wives have time to commit adultery? Certainly, you are aware of how jawans are deployed at borders and stay away from their houses most of the time which you think is enough for their wives to commit adultery and dishonour their pride. Otherwise what was the reason for making a shitty show like XXX 2 and attack Army culture and Army people in it?
You depicted in Alt Balaji web series that the wife of an army officer is having an illicit affair with her lover while her husband is at the frontline and also that the wife of the army officer makes her lover wear her husband’s army uniform during their intimate moments and more. Do you really think just because the husband is away at the borders where he would not even get a sniff of his wife illicit relationship, the Army wife will commit adultery because she is sexually frustrated?
I understand ‘Naam, Namak and Nishaan’ are alien words in the world you live in and make a living off but these are realities over which entire paltans go to war even when they know none of them might come back because this breed of people; the Faujis, are trained for years to be raised as soldiers who indeed will die for ‘HONOUR’ because this is the only thing worth dying for.
There is a famous quote
For how can a man die better than facing fearful odds, For the ashes of his father and the temples of his Gods?
Just not the soldier but his entire family and especially his wife imbibe this philosophy by their heart because there are honour and pride in dying for your nation and people. Do you think women of such brave men would do anything to dishonour them? Do you think a soldier would be willing to make supreme sacrifice if his wife is dishnouring him behind his back? Why would he when he will learn he has already lost his honour?
Do you understand what you are doing here?
You are attacking the entire belief system of an organization where Honour is everything. You are truly belittling them; your own soldiers who are providing you the ‘freedom to create’ even something as shitty as this
I understand I totally understand these are erotic series, there is a disclaimer but would you create something similar for a president’s wife? No! Because you hold respect for that chair. Do you remember how Rajputs stood for an ancient queen called ‘Padmavati’ for a slight rise in her skirt in a simple movie that was actually created with an intent to glorify her?
And here, you are discrediting and dishonoruing an entire organization and people. You want to know about Army wives, I tell you about Army wives.
~Salma Shafeeq Ghori lost her husband Major Ghori in 2004 in a counter insurgency operation in Kashmir. She chose not to remarry and raised their children Saif and Sufia then aged 4 and 6 with utmost pride and dignity. Today they both are working with respectable firms.
~Subhashini Vasanth lost her husband Colonel Vasanth Venugopal Commanding officer 9 Martha li in an insurgency operation in URI. She channeled her inner grief to empower other veer naris like her and three months later founded Vasanthratna Foundation. She had also been the recipient of the Neeraja Bhanot Award 2016.
~Karuna Chauhan the young wife of Lt Cdr D S Chuhan could only be fifteen days with her husband when she lost him on INS Vikramaditya within one and half month of their marriage and still puts sindoor, bindi and bangles of his name becuase that is how he always wanted her.
~Pallavi Sharma wife of Colonel Ashutosh Sharma Commanding Officer 21 RR who recently made the supreme sacrifice leading from the front called another young Army wife Mrs. Akriti Sood who also lost her husband in Handwara encounter first thing she received the news of her husband martyrdom on 2nd May 2020 because this is what is her duty as an Army wife.
~Captain Riya Nehra adorned uniform after the young Army wife lost her husband in a snow clearing operation in 2002 because she wanted to step into her husband’s shoes to honour his memories. It was when women were hardly seen in risky jobs.
Leave alone wives I hope you at least would be knowing about Captain Vikram batra? His girlfriend never married after she lost Captain Batra in Kargil. What do you think stopped her? The sheer pride that any woman in relationship with a man in uniform (which you dishonoured so casually) holds.
Dear Ekta Kapoor if you will look for true stories of Army wives you will find thousands and thousands of such stories that depict how these Armed Forces wives channeled the insurmountable pain and rose above social stigmas and honoured their husbands who served their nation with pride, dignity, and honour.
If you respect your nation, your Army, if you truly value the courage of every man who lost his life for the nation and grief of every woman behind him, you must pull down this webseries and extend an apology to all of us.
Wishing You best,
A very proud Army Wife
This Fauji wife could only be 15 days with her Naval Officer husband to fall in love for a lifetime
Confessions of Indian Army Wives
Coursemates pay their last tributes to beloved Lt Colonel Robert TA who sacrificed his life in North Sikkim Avalanche
Living in Separate Family Accommodation (SF) and surviving it
The unsung heroes of Army : Army wives
A CRPF Commandant who woke up for sehri instead picked up gun and foiled a terror attack
8 thoughts on “An Army Wife’s open letter to Ekta Kapoor”
I doubt if those women in the show biz can understand this.
Ekta is interested in money and that is all she understands having been born and living in that peculiar environment. She does not understand such explanations because she does not want to. It is more a matter of upbringing than a sudden inspiration.
An army officer’s wife’s life is no joke! Since she is holding the home front boldly, with a smile , mostly , even during very trying periods at home, while he is away from the home front . when there is peace time all is well. But when the endless war is going on; and he is posted there, many of our girls have to become very bold and give him assurance ;;;
So that he is mentally free, because he knows she is there to face all the good and bad even worst circumstances by herself .
Whosoever insults our army officers or their wives will undergo difficult periods
In future. No one can ever be happy by insulting and torturing the other’s souls.
Bharat is a karam-bhumi;; jaissa karogeh , vaisaa bharoge. Kanchan kumar
I don’t think we can penalize a show for telling a very specific story. I don’t think it is a sweeping statement about all Army marriages.
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