A fairytale wedding, a handsome groom,elated parents and joyous air was something Sameeksha Rohilla had craved since long but the journey was not easy and it took the couple a lot to tie the nuptial knots. Afterall it was not any love story but the love story of an Army officer and Sameeksha was an ARMY GIRLFRIEND whose love life was mostly consumed beside a mobile phone than over coffee cups at fancy restaurants with her BAE. There were times she felt like giving up as well. Sameeksha and Arun met during their college days. Arun was her super-super senior, a great photographer and lead singer of college band. Both of them could feel the spark between them but Sameeksha clearly told him that she was not looking for a casual relationship rather the one for life,with permission from elders. Arun promised her to be something,someone she could be proud of introducing to her parents. It was not even four months of their casual interaction and hardly a month of their relationship that Arun was actually selected for OTA. He still calls Sameeksha his lady luck. But life changed after that. When you meet the right person you know he is the one and you are willing to wait for them but stories of Army girlfriends are little different. They don’t only wait but also undergo a lot of mental stress. Pain,separation,patriotism,courage and love is what makes an Army love story unique. Let’s hear out to her.
“As soon as he joined OTA we could not even call each other and instead wrote letters . Letters which he will read hidden in a bathroom. Getting caught only meant severe punishment from seniors so he had to be careful about that. Initially I took this letter writing sportingly but as time passed I started getting irritated. Who the hell writes letters these days? My mother mentions how they would write letters their days but in the era of phone,tablet,wi fi and internet tell me who the hells communicate through letters? I never realised it was just the start of a Military Relationship“
There were times Arun will mention about his punishments and tough training. This will make Sameeksha cry. She remembers
“When he returned after his first term in OTA. He had lost lot of weight,there were cuts and bruises all over.His waist size had drastically reduced. He also had ligament tear. I could not even recognize him. It was a shock to me but he held my hand and said I need your support. Lot many of my coursemates are dealing with heartbreaks,their girlfriends have left them. They were not courageous enough to deal with the life meant for a Soldier. I hope you would not leave me like that. It is a tough time but we need to stay strong and sail it together.”
She would see other couples, they would always be together while there were times when she desperately wanted to reach him,talk to him but could not. She will feel jealous of other ‘normal’ couple. Letters were the only mode of communication during his OTA training. Sometimes she would miss him badly but all she could do was to wait. She shares how that would make her frustrated and angry which she would take out on Arun when on some Sundays he called for 3 minutes exactly. Arun will also lose patience. He was also undergoing a tough phase at OTA and they would fight throughout the phone but as soon as the phone was kept down,the surge of guilt and nostalgia would hit them hard and they would then apologize through letters. Sameeksha was pursuing law that time,on some days she will lose complete focus and on some days she put all her focus on her studies just to keep her distracted and engaged. That actually helped her score well. Sometimes letters from Arun would be drenched in blood from his cuts and bruises. He wrote letters after light went off hiding in a washroom. That was too much of a tension for a young girl her age and many a times she also felt like giving up.But the connection between them was so strong that they could never give up on each other.
“My elder sister supported me a lot but it was especially tough during his Passing Out Parade I desperately wanted to attend that but I was just 21 that time and my parents did not allow me to go. But I felt extremely proud once he called me after POP saying ‘Hello Lieutenant Arun calling this side’ and that gave me a goosebump. I started calling him Lieutenant Arun which I now feel was so funny. I also hoped that things will be better now as we always planned. But both of us never knew OTA was just the trailer and he received his high altitude posting at Drass.”
Sameeksha shares how her world turned upside down as he received his posting in Drass because letters and occasional calls also stopped.He had a risky job profile. He carried a phone but there would hardly be any network. It would be one- two months when one single message reached him,sometimes this duration would reach a period of six months if he moved to forward posts further in Drass. Sometimes he’d call abruptly at wee hours and those days Sameeksha would always be conscious about her phone and wait for those abrupt 1 minute calls throughout the day. That demanded lot of patience from the Army girlfriend and she would cry a lot. Sometimes she would wonder why can she not have a normal relationship.
She also shares how she would stare her friends in disbelief talking about their relationships where the biggest hurdle they faced were not getting calls from their Bae for a day or two they would also mention how their boyfriends ignored them and they did break up. They also kept telling her ‘You know that right? You are also in ‘Long Distance’ relationship? And she felt like punching them shouting out loud ‘no it is not long distance relationship but an Army relationship‘ and it is lot tougher than you think.’
She was in final year law by then and she got to know about marriage proposals Arun has started receiving. That perplexed her and she would question Arun’s loyalty now…… like he did hers during academy and he would say
“There is not point of going through everything together if I back out now. We know what we have shared together. If there is one girl I will marry that would be you. Let my field posting be completed we will get married.”
“There comes a phase in everyone’s life when you suddenly become overtly religious especially if you are going through rough phases. Drass was one such period for me. Avalanches were common and I kept hearing terrorist attacks or encounters on TV. I would see Army officers getting martyred. He also went for patrolings and more. Many a times his own hut buried under deep snow but he survived. That scared the shit out of me and I prayed to God if Arun comes back home safely I would stop eating non vegetarian even though I was a hard core non vegetarian. I also started keeping fast on mondays and visited temples oftenly. My parents were very happy because of this transformation though they never realised the real intent behind it…Haha!”
When he visited Bhopal during his leaves it only lasted for 20-25 days.That time Arun also had lot of pressure from his relatives side to get married. Then both of them informed their parents about each other. When the families met together,they instantly liked each other a lot and decided to get their kids married once Arun’s field posting would be over. But life had still not stopped throwing challenges before Sameeska, during that period she lost her grandmother with whom she was extremely closed to.
She says that was perhaps the lowest phase of my life. I would keep crying for whole day, I wanted someone to talk to but I literally had no one. Arun was dealing with his own problems and no matter how desperately I wanted I could never reach him. My friends stopped listening because they never understood my problem which were Army exclusive. My sister was also studying in United Kingdom that time. Our time zone never matched and I could not talk my heart out. I still don’t know how did I passed that period. But he came,he came for me.”
She went into depression but that time Arun realised how badly Sameeksha needs him and he took leave for a month and spent that whole month uplifting Sameeksha’s morale. Once he left, Sameeksha started picking up her pace again but soon she received a news of heavy avalanches in Drass exactly at Arun’s post. There were no mode of communication neither any information. She googled Delhi Headquarters contact and somehow connected with them. Once she called them they asked about Arun’s unit and other details but she was not very clear about it (it happens! Right? Frankly it takes ladies years to become connoisseur of Army lingo )
They somehow located him and informed her about his well being. They refused to give any other information Sameeksha was restless but also relieved that atleast Arun was safe. It was only after 10 days when Arun called and informed how every communication and supply lines were blocked and damaged so it was impossible to connect. Sameeksha cried in relief. She shared
“I told him any more adventure and I might get a heart attack. That was of course on a lighter note but I prayed and prayed a lot. Arun’s tenure in Drass was almost completed by then and he left for his new posting. It was only after sometimes he left I heard about URI Attacks and Surgical strikes though I was relieved, my heart went out for all the soldiers posted there protecting us. I prayed for their families and them.”
Sameeksha and Arun got married on 29th January 2019 in a grand ceremony with complete blessings from both sides of families. I met her as an young Army wife who was dazed with the grandeur of Army life and more from the rules,regulation and protocols. The smile on her face is infectious and she finds Army culture overwhelming but I could make out what brilliant of an Army wife is in making. Infact she also won many hearts from her participation in ladies club activity. The newly wed was welcomed with great love and affection . After all these are the new age Army wives who would shape our future and influence the ethos us as Army fraternity hold so dearly.
Hope you liked an inside peek into an Army girlfriend’s life (now an Army wife) It is easy to fall for a man in uniform but it is extremely tough to maintain the relationship with soldiers. It takes a woman of steel to do that. Army love stories are extraordinary tales of how true love still exist. If you want to connect with her,the young millennial Army wife has great sense of fashion and style and she shares her panache at these social media handles
Instagram : THE STYLE GAATHA
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And if you want to read more of extraordinary military romances you must read the much loved books